Team America: Battle US
The Team America: Battle US Was A Movie And A Sequel To Team America. Plot The plot begins with a scene reminiscent of the opening of Star Trek. Team America had existed in the late 60s to early 70s, and the team sent in a special forces air craft to check a disturbence in the Atlantic Ocean. They find a UFO hovering over the lake, and this UFO immdiately launches missles at the ship, unti Team America gets a voice message saying that their captain must meet with the UFO's captain. The captain is forced to comply and leaves young John Johnson in charge of the team. The captain enters via teleportation and meets the captain of an alien Cockroach race known as the Cock-a-roaches. After a few brief questions, The cockroach leader kills the captain and then both ships take evasive action. The Cock-a-roaches ship proves to be too powerful for Team America, so John Johnson orders the young Spottswoode to get every surviving member of Team America, espcially his pregtnant wife, Jessie, to the escape pods. John tries to get the aircraft to auto pilot towards the UFO, but the auto pilot function was destroyed, forcing him to do manual control, despite promising his wifew that he would be in the escape pods. In the escape pod, their new baby girl is born and they decide to name it Mary after decideing the name Lauren was a retarded name. John and Jessie talk through screen communication, and John tells her that he loves her just before his graphic and drawn-out death in ramming the aircraft into the UFO, destroying both. The Cock-a-roach captain, however, manages to escape. Years later, we see the current Team America infiltrating Osama Bin Laden's compound, destroying most of Pakistan in the process. The Team puts Osama in a corner, and is being forced to surrender, but Osama warns the Team that they are fools if they think they have won, because even with his death, a power threat is approaching. Gary Johnston, the Team America leader, shoots down Bin Laden and then Lisa, his wife, reveals to him that she is pregnant. The moment is cut shirt, when two of Bin Laden's sons, Kadhija and Khalid, run into the scene and shoot at Gary, but at the last momute, Lia pushes Gary out of the way of the bullets and takes the shots instead. The two sons are shot dead and a dying Lisa notes how this is exactly how Carson, her old flame, died. Gary and the other Team members then mourns the lost of Lisa. Months later, a new member was found by Spottswoode in a bar, singing a very racy song. Spottswoode recognizes her as Mary Johnson, daughter of the late great John Johnson. She is asked to join the Team, utilizing her singing abilities to coax terrorists into trusting her. Mary refuses at first, however, due to her not believing her father was originally part of special forces. When Spottswoode begins leave the bar, he is attacked by Casey Anthony, making him drop a picture. Mary kills Casey, saving Spottswoode's life, and she sees that the picture is of his parents with Spottswoode and the original Team America members, making her decide to join the Team. Mary Johnson meets the Team members Chris, Joe, and Sarah, the last of which feels nothing but contempt for Mary. Mary then meets Gary, and he begins to have feelings for her, but tries to push them out due to him not wanting to damage himself again. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. informs the Team that Muammar Gaddafi has alligned himself with the Bin Laden children in order to plan something. The Team makes it's way to Lybia, and Mary sings to distract the children while the Team attacks the base, destroying a good chunk of Lybia.After the fire-fight, however, it is revealed that Gaddafi was derailing the Team from the real forces of danger, the Cock-a-roaches of Gyron, lead by Kim Jong-Il, attacking America. Meanwhile, the Film Actors Guild (F.A.G.), lead by Clint Eastwood, is deciding what to do in retaliation for Team America murdering a few of their members. A Joker make-up wearing Michelle Williams, after stabbing Eddie Murphy in the eye with a pencil and slashing the cheeks and gums of Clint Eastwood, convinces the group to join forces with the Singers League of Unity Team (S.L.U.T.) and the Cock-a-roaches, which Lady Gaga reveals to be related to them. Back in Lybia, the Gary is trying to think of a plan to take the new foes down, but Mary decides to storm in and kill the Cock-a-roaches herself. Sarah wanted her to die, but Gary decides to save Mary. After a run in with some Cock-a-roaches and Sarah Palin, the Team reunites back at the base, where they learn that the Obamas suppositively made peace with the Cock-a-roaches. Spottswoode, while unsure about how true the claim is, tells the Team to take a break for tonight. At night, Sarah bashes Mary, calling her "stupidly bold" and said her singing voice makes whales eat eachother. The same night, Mary finds Gary masterbating on old videos of him and Lisa on summer vacation, playing in the beach and killing terrorists. Gary is appalled by his own behaviour after Mary makes herself present, but she simply tells Gary she knows what it's like to lose a loved one. She tells the story of her old boyfriend, Jake, whom she met when she first tried singing. One day, while singing in a lounge, a drunk throws a bottle at her, thinking she was a bird. Jake takes the hit instead, breaking open a part of his skull and instantly killing him. Mary's singing got Jake killed, and she had to live with this fact every single day. Gary feels more of a connection with Mary now, and proceeds to have a long, drawn-out, and vulgar sex scene.The meanwhile, after killing Carmen Electra and Rebecca Black in a scene reblicating Pan's Labyrinth, Michelle Williams and Lady Gaga bow down to Kim Jong-Ill, leader of the Cock-a-roaches. He wants revenge against Team America for ruining his perfect plans years ago. With the aid of Gaddafi and the surviving Bin Laden children, they reveal that they will us the Obamas in order to coax the humans into believing they are innocent, and then strike at their lowest point. The next day, after hearing a speech from Barrack, Team America thinks that something is fishy about the "peace", so they attempt to track down where the Cock-a-roaches are hiding. The Team ends up being ambushed a la I, Robot, but manage to survive it. After killing the almighty Morgan Freeman, Mary and Sarah begin to talk trash towards eachother, which leads into a fistfight after Sarah calls her singing "BS splurting out the ass", but Gary stops the fight. Mary decides that teamwork is stupid and is going to fight this war on her own, saying that no one close would be killed that way. Chris and Gary attempt to talk to Sarah, stating that they themselves argued with eachother before, but it did nothing to help the Team. Sarah does not seem to listen, however. In the meantime, Michelle Williams decides that it would help the F.A.G. if Team America's leader got killed, so she gathers a few of the cohorts together, use Lady Gaga to find out who is the leader and where he is, and then go to his house. Spottswoode is inside, talking to Mary over the phone, reinacting a scene from Watchmen, stating that she is making a big mistake leaving the Team, but she believes that she will save the Team by working alone. Mary then hangs up, and suddenly, Michelle Williams and her cohorts break his door down and begins to fight Spottswoode. He sees the F.A.G. as Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Benito Mussolini, Hideki Tōjō, Fidel Castro, Mao Zedong, Saddam Hussein, Napoléon Bonaparte, George III, and Eva Braun. Spottswoode ends up being killed by Michelle Williams slaming her late husband's Best Supporting Actor Oscar into his face. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. breaks the news to the Team, causing them to cry. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., however, reveals to the Team that Spottswoode already set up a replacement incase he ever passed on. The replacement turned out to be Jean Francois, who first saw Team America in France back in 2004 as a little boy. Jean said that he at first thought that Team America was a threat, a plague, a monster, a fraud, a curse, a disease, etc., until he saw the speech that Gary made on television, making him realize that Team America is actually very good, and later, after hearing that he was a canidate for being the successor of Spottswoode, he accepted. Jean tells the Team that he has already gone ahead and found out that the Cock-a-roaches are going to use S.L.U.T. to control everybody on the planet, turning them into slaves. The Team decides that they'll need to show the Obamas that the Cock-a-roaches are lying to them. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. then tells the Team to hurry, because he has just heard that Mary is going to go and kill the Obamas. We cut to Mary carrying a rifle, and locking on to Barack Obama, mimicing the scene from Terminator 2: Judgement Day. Barack dogdes the bullet just in the nick of time, and he and Michelle run for safety. Mary gets the two cornered and is about to shoot, but Team America crashes in just as Mary is an inch from pulling the trigger. Sarah kicks the gun out of Mary's hands and begins to yell at her. The boys quickly calm Sarah down and explain to the Obamas that the Cock-a-roaches are just lying to them in order to get the public's trust. The Obamas do not believe the Team at first, but suddenly, Voice cast * Trey Parker as Gary Johnston / Carson / Joe / Kim Jong-il / Martin Sheen / Charlie Sheen / Gary Oldman / Woody Allen / Jake Gyllenhaal / Johnny Depp / John Travolta / Tom Cruise / Jeremy Renner / Ben Affleck / Woody Harrelson / Bradley Cooper / Phillip Seymour Hoffman / Robin Williams / Alan Arkin / Chris Cooper / Dustin Hoffman / Christopher Plummer / John Cusack / Jim Carrey / Dennis Quaid / Randy Quaid / Ken Watanabe / Cillian Murphy / Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson / Mark Wahlberg / Ryan Goslin / Peter O'Toole / Adrien Brody / Denzel Washington / Joaquin Phoenix / Jack Black / Ewan McGregor / Bruno Mars / Mike Myers / Jamie Foxx / John Malkovich / Colin Farrell / Robert Redford / Will.i.am / Apl.de.ap / Taboo / Elton John / Ozzy Osbourne / Sharon Osbourne / Jack Osbourne / Kelly Osbourne / Liam Neeson / Simon Pegg / Russell Brand / Eric Bana / Anton Yelchin / John Mayer / Hugh Jackman / Sacha Baron Cohen / Steve Martin / Lil Wayne / Sarah Jessica Parker / Kristin Davis / Cynthia Nixon / Kim Cattrall / Ed Harris / Nicolas Cage / Steve Tyler / Kanye West / Russell Crowe / Jackie Earle Haley / Billy Crudup / Geoffrey Rush / Jim Broadbent / Michael Douglas / Michael Bay / Christian Bale / Harrison Ford / Michael Fassbender / Ashton Kutcher / Liza Minnelli / Barbra Streisand / Cher / Eric Roberts / Drunk in Bar / Other voices * Matt Stone as Chris / Warren Beatty / Steve Carrell / Chris Pine / Tom Hardy / Joseph Gordon-Levitt / Tim Burton / Leonardo DiCaprio / Jude Law / Kevin Bacon / Viggo Mortensen / Chris Brown / Sam Worthington / Zachary Quinto / Adam Sandler / Owen Wilson / Ralph Fiennes / Ben Stiller / Mickey Rooney / Orlando Bloom / Kurt Russell / Don Cheadle / Alan Rickman / Robert Downey Jr. / Usher / Karl Urban / Nick Frost / Eddie Murphy / Daniel Craig / Hugo Weaving / Jeff Bridges / Richard Dreyfuss / Christopher Walken / John C. Reilly / James Franco / Jame McAvoy / Sylvester Stallone / Brad Pitt / Bruce Willis / Ke$ha / Lindsay Lohan / Other voices * Tara Strong as Mary Johnson / Cock-a-roaches/ Maggie Gyllenhaal / Ellen Page / Katie Holms / Uma Thurman / Anne Hathaway / Naomi Watts / Christina Aguilera / Zooey Deschanel / Jennifer Garner / Abigail Breslin / Jessica Alba / Jessica Biel / Kelly Preston / Michelle Pfeiffer / Justin Bieber's singing voice / Other Voices * Kristen Miller as Lisa * Masasa as Sarah * Daran Norris as Spottswoode / Tom Hanks / Dick Van Dyke / Vince Vaughn / Hugh Laurie / Willem Dafoe / William Shatner / Anthony Hopkins / Jon Voight / Jack Nicholson / Paul Reubens / Michael Bolton / Roman Polanski / Tommy Lee Jones / Robert De Niro * Phil Hendrie as I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. / Osama bin Laden / Al Pacino / Ben Kingsley * Maurice LaMarche as Clint Eastwood / Enrique Iglesias / Kneau Reeves / Leonard Nimoy / Kevin Spacey / Bill Murray / Ben Stein / Mel Gibson / Daniel Day-Lewis / Javier Bardem / Mickey Rourke * Jeremy Shada as Jean Francois * Ashleigh Ball as Miley Cyrus / Melissa Leo / Cameron Diaz / Kate Hudson / Penélope Cruz / Goldie Hawn / Annette Bening / Kathy Bates / Hailee Steinfeld / Julianne Moore / Jennifer Connelly / Sandra Bullock / Taylor Swift / Angelina Jolie / P!nk / Avril Lavigne / Demi Moore / Marisa Tomei / Hilary Swank / Scarlett Johansson / Charlize Theron / Gwyneth Paltrow / Dolly Parton / Joan Cusack / Michelle Rodriguez / Meg Ryan / Lily Tomlin / Jessica Simpson / Other Voices * Andrea Libman as Jessie Johnson / Jennifer Aniston / Drew Berrymore / Helena Bonham Carter / Julia Roberts / Amy Adams / Dakota Fanning / Elle Fanning / Sarah Palin / Ellen DeGeneres / Michelle Williams / Kristen Stewart / Sigourney Weaver / Robert Pattinson / Taylor Lautner / Lucy Liu / Daryl Hannah / Jodie Foster / Tina Fey / Kirsten Dunst / Renée Zellweger / Selena Gomez / Jennifer Lawrence / Betty White / Winona Ryder / Reese Witherspoon / Sean Astin / Natalie Portman / Geena Davis / Ashlee Simpson / Adam Lambert / Marion Cotillard's French dialogue / Other Voices * Cathy Weseluck as Justin Timberlake / Katy Perry / Daniel Radcliffe / Rupert Grint / Elijah Wood / Justin Bieber / Other Voices * Tabitha St. Germain as Jennifer Lopez / Catherine Zeta-Jones / Nicole Kidman / Sissy Spacek / Diane Keaton / Megan Fox / Marion Cotillard / Faye Dunaway / Mia Farrow / Ann-Margaret / Fergie / Kate Winslet / Keira Knightley / Cate Blanchett / Emma Watson / Helen Mirren / Glenn Close / Jane Fonda / Meryl Streep / Julie Andrews / Tilda Swinton / Judi Dench / Mariah Carey / Andie MacDowell / Anna Paquin / Eva Mendes / Jamie Lee Curtis / Emily Blunt / Other Voices * Cree Summer as Lady Gaga / Zoe Saldana / Oprah Winfrey / Whoopi Goldberg / Vivica A. Fox / Mo'Nique / Beyoncé / Rihanna / Jennifer Hudson / Alicia Keys / Halle Berry / Nicki Minaj / Whitney Houston / Adele / Queen Latifah / Jada Pinkett Smith / Jaden Smith / Willow Smith * Nicole Oliver as Michelle Obama / Shakira * Abbey DiGregorio as Lacey Chabert * Ikue Ōtani as Zhang Ziyi * Joe Morton as Barack Obama * Cathy Cavadini as Madonna * E.G. Daily as Britney Spears * Liliana Mumy as Rebecca Black * Nicky Jones as Bin Laden children * Fred Tatasciore as Will Smith / Robert Duvall / Ludacris / Laurence Fishburne / Ian McKellen / Michael Caine / Christopher Lee / Morgan Freeman / Nick Nolte / Jay-Z / Colin Firth / Forest Whitaker / Pitbull / Arnold Schwarzenegger / Christoph Waltz / Muammar Gaddafi * Maryke Hendrikse as Casey Anthony / Cock-a-roaches * Kathleen Barr as Carmen Electra * Chris Hemsworth as John Johnson Video Game The Video Game Of Team America: Battle US References to popular culture Category:Movies